i felt the need to stop here now. it's no longer important who's going to win or lose or whatever. in the first place, this isn't a game. and i don't aim to win. i'm not good enough to be called a winner. or maybe i'm just too weak and too scared to try.
oh well, as long as i had fun along the way, it's enough. what i had is enough, sometimes even too much. to the point that i can't accept it anymore. somebody else deserves the trophy more than me.
now, i'm awake again :D